Clearly Seeing Your Kids-Potty Training

I am so fortunate to have a woman in my life who has a mom's bible study group that meets every other week. Her name is Karen Stubbs, mother of 4, and she has begun a ministry for moms called Birds on a Wire - The Balanced Life of Motherhood (www.birdsonawiremoms.com). It has been such a wonderful resource of help, encouragement, practical advice, and often times a swift kick in the butt.
I tell you all of that because about a month or so ago Karen talked about seeing our children clearly. Recognizing that you may have a child that has some anger issues for example, and then addressing that issue. Oftentimes our husbands will see the issue before us b/c we are around them so much. I am not sure if you are like me or not, but sometimes hearing things from Jason about our kids is difficult for me...b/c I am with them always, I should be the one to see and know things about them better than anyone else. Listen to your husbands wives...they are fresh eyes into our worlds.
So after Karen challenged us to see our kids clearly, I just began praying that over the next few days that the Lord would open my eyes to each of my kids individuality so I could help them, and the Lord could use me to shape them for their lives. If you do this...you'll see then that those heart issues that they struggle with at 3,4, 5 etc...will probably be heart issues they struggle w/ as adults, so we must intercept it now and not wait to address anger, or lack of submission to authority, or whines, or lying etc. when they are teenagers.
Here was my practical seeing my child where he was at in this season of his life issue. Potty training. AHHHHHH!!! Potty training...I am fairly certain I have messed Caroline up for life b/c of how I potty trained her - ha (side note...my mom does say tongue in cheek that most issues probably go back to how kids were potty trained- ha). I was going to do it differently this time. We began in July...I had a great perspective. I looked for little improvements every day fully knowing accidents would happen. Well....fast forward now to late October and sweet Wyatt was worse now than he was in July. He was angry, he was defiant, he did NOT want to go on the potty. We were at odds with each other. I was not finding it joyful being his mommy. Then I hear Karen's challenge of seeing our kids clearly - and while this totally pertains to heart issues...I think it also pertains to developmental issues as well. So, I stopped. I personally felt like a failure. That my friends is a lie, but it was still how I felt. I wondered if the next day when I said absolutely nothing about the potty how things would be - it was WONDERFUL, and he was wet and dirty and didn't care! We liked each other again. I changed my expectations. I saw him clearly where he was. So, we went back to diapers (he cried and said they were for babies...but then was just fine with it), then pull ups...and today Lo and Behold!!! He ASKED for his underwear and as I type this has been dry and clean all day!!!
My take away...to continue to ask the Lord (why do I forget this) to see my children clearly. In each season, phase, grade level and hormone filled life...to ask HIM! He knows them and loves them more than I do. So, today ask the Lord to help you see your little ones or not so little ones clearly. Ask HIM for help in knowing how to shape those heart and developmental issues. He will answer. He says in James when we ask for wisdom he gives it! Go and clearly see your child! You are doing a good work and you can not come down from it!